I once heard Kelly Ripa quip, “A vacation isn’t a vacation with kids. That’s called a trip. It’s not a vacation unless it’s without kids.”

Well, under that definition, my husband and I are about to take our first.

We leave next week for a beautiful, tropical island sans our boys which I’m mostly looking forward to.

My parents, bless them, will be in charge of our two little guys for exactly four nights, three and a half days. They have plenty of cousins and aunts and grammies and grampies around to keep them entertained. So they should be fine, right?

My parents have me worried.

THEY are worried.

My little one is 19 months and my older one is three and a half years. Not so worried about him. But I keep thinking that I’m somehow going to be causing them emotional damage or that they’ll have abandonment issues because mom and dad left. My mom keeps asking me, “What’ll I DO with two kids? What’ll I DO?” (It’s then I remind her that she raised four. How about whatever she did with us?)

I guess I’m asking for a little reassurance.

Ever left your kids while you went on a couples retreat for a few days? Regrets? Totally worth it? Peace of mind would be great right now as our non-refundable tickets to Puerto Rico are hanging over my head…

I love that Lolo Jones announced in an interview Tuesday that she’s a virgin.

I love that it made headline news.

Assoicated Press

Just goes to show that something that was once standard is now news-worthy. I guess it’s enough of a rarity that a professional athlete who’s 29, successful, and gorgeous would actually even consider waiting until marriage to have sex.

“It’s just something, a gift that I want to give to my husband.”

You go, girl!

In an era where now more than half of babies born to American women under 30 are out of wedlock, I think it’s great that a person of high profile speak out for abstinence. Which may not be an easy road-but it’s definitely one worth taking, for many, many reasons.

Jones went on to say how hard it’s been to keep her goal. “Harder than training for the Olympics, harder than graduating from college, has been to stay a virgin before marriage,” she says. Which suggests there may have been multiple opportunities to compromise her values. But she has stayed strong, which speaks volumes about her character.

During the course of my career as an entertainer, I’ve been asked more times than I can count why I chose to wait until after I was married to have sex. People in Hollywood just couldn’t believe that I would actually want to do something like that for myself. They asked if my parents, or religion was “forcing” me into making that decision.

Nope. I guess I’ve been lucky in my life to see firsthand the struggles and trials that come with getting pregnant at a young age and outside of wedlock. I wanted to keep that “gift” as Jones said, unopened until I met THE person I’d be with the rest of my life.

I don’t condemn people who’ve chosen not to wait until marriage. I know couples who didn’t, decided to get married later on, and have made things work. But in a day where sex has become almost as casual as a handshake, I’m glad there’s someone standing up for something that, in my opinion, should be considered much more sacred.

Every season when “The Bachelor” or “Bachelorette” rolls around, I always say, “This is trash! This is junk! I’m not watching this one.”

 Photo by Craig Sjodin, ABC

And then….(insert vacuum sound here) I get sucked in.

I went over to my sister’s house to watch the premiere of “The Bachelorette” starring Emily Maynard on Monday. We made some treats, cuddled on the couch and gabbed about the guys, the clothes, the fact that she’s a mom, her breakup with Brad…you know. All the important stuff.

Maybe it’s the fact that she’s a single mom, or her tragic story about losing her fiance in a plane crash right before she found out she was expecting his child, six-year-old Ricki, or her classy ‘tude, but something about Emily has me a little star-struck. I know she probably won’t find love. Well, scratch that-she may find love, but the chances of it LASTING are slim to none, based on past season’s track records. And I know it’s not the “real world” they’re living in, a completely unrealistic situation, and basically a show that promotes cheating on everyone with everyone until you narrow it down to the one who still decided to stick around after weeks of sharing the same girl with 25 other guys. Weird!

So why is the show so popular? Are we that desperate to believe in the hopeless romantic who will do anything (including traveling the world for free and getting paid to make-out on TV) to find their one true match?

I don’t know why “The Bachelor” has been so popular, but there’s even a Mormon spin-off on the Internet called “The Mormon Bachelor”. The guy of the hour is Kent Tuttle, a BYU, volly-ball playing grad who’s looking to find true love the creative way. Who knows? The first round produced a marriage, so Kent could get lucky. In finding a woman to marry.

Check out Kent’s journey at www.themormonbachelorette.com. It’s probably a much cleaner, less-drama induced love story than ABC’s “The Bachelorette.”

Hey, maybe we could hook him up with Emily??? Now THAT would be a handsome couple…

Next week’s issue of TIME is causing quiet a stir…the cover features a woman breastfeeding her son.

Now, perhaps that in and of itself shouldn’t be too brow-raising…I personally believe we’re far too squeamish when it comes to such a natural, normal, important thing such as a mother nourishing and bonding with her child, HOWEVER…the child pictured on the cover with his mom is three years old.

The article discusses “Attachment Parenting”, a method highly endorsed by Dr. Bill Sears, which suggests creating strong bonds between mother (and father) and child, de-bunking the spoiling myth that babies can get too much attention during their first year. Sears talks about the dangers of the cry-it-out method, Baby Wise theories, and other strict schedule-oriented routines that purposefully separate mother and child in order to promote independence. Sears believes-and has research to prove-that these theories only work to create feelings of insecurity, making the child more dependent and needy than an attachment-raised child.

“A child must go through a stage of healthy dependence in order to later become securely independent,” Sears states.

Attachment parenting encourages bonding through co-sleeping, baby-wearing, and prolonged breastfeeding.

When my firstborn was around 6 months old, I felt like I was at my wit’s end. He still wasn’t sleeping through the night, he sometimes nursed every 45 minutes, and wanted to be held constantly. I was given many books by well-intentioned family members and friends encouraging me to “put him on a schedule” for his own good. But despite my efforts, and the pit I had in my stomach every time I tried letting him cry, or prolonging his feedings because it wasn’t the right “time”, those methods didn’t take. And they didn’t feel right.

Then I discovered “The Sleep Book” by Dr. Sears. I remember feeling totally at peace after reading it. I felt like I wasn’t a bad parent-in fact, I felt empowered knowing my gut instincts were right about how I felt I was to raise my child. I agreed with much of what he said, and we co-slept with both our kids for several months when they were newly born. It was easier to breast-feed, easier to sleep, and a much easier way to cope with those early morning feedings.

I know Sears is considered somewhat of a controversial doc. Some of his philosophies are not popular or mainstream.

As this TIME article proves, prolonged breastfeeding falls under the “extreme” category, creating a huge rift between people who see the cover and celebrate, and people who see it and are repulsed.

I’m not sure how I feel. I nursed both my boys for 15 months. Around that time, I felt physically and mentally done, and decided to wean. But I know women who nurse until two or later, and they have perfectly happy, healthy, well-developed children. I don’t think I could go past the 15-18 month mark, personally, but do I think it’s “wrong” to breastfeed toddlers longer than that? No. I’d be uncomfortable nursing my three-year-old who is reading and writing and potty-trained and talking a million miles a minute, but I don’t think it should be controversial. It’s a personal decision.

If you want to learn more about Dr. Sears or Attachment Parenting (AP) go to askdrsears.com and click on “Attachment Parenting.” Check out next week’s edition of TIME.

And mommies…what do YOU think about AP-or this issue of TIME in general? How and when did you make the decision to stop nursing?

Anyone who has a child, will have a child, or has had a child: there is a wonderful parenting expo this weekend at the Salt Palace put on by someone very special to me: my mother-in-law, First Lady Jeanette Herbert.

This amazing woman has raised six children, owned a successful daycare business, and now has 13 grandchildren. The principles and values she instilled in her home and the workplace have carried over to ours, and we frequently ask this parenting guru questions on what to do about fights, colds, tantrums, school problems, sibling rivalry, surviving on three hours sleep, and everything in between.

“Uplift Utah Families,” Mrs. Herbert’s initiative, is all about strengthening and building better families, no matter the circumstance. Workshops this weekend include classes on deciding when to preschool, how to de-clutter your home, healthy eating and exercise habits for your family, controlling emotions, raising children with autism, adolescents and difficulties, classes just for fathers, helping children develop a healthy cultural identity, and many, many more.

Speakers include New York Times bestselling authors and parenting experts Richard and Linda Eyre as well as child expert Matt Townsend, and radio personality Amanda Dickson. Popular entertainers including David Osmond and Jessie Clark Funk, as well as performances by Utah Hispanic Dance Alliance and Asante African Performing Arts.

Don’t miss this opportunity to make a difference in your family life and create a better home.

Friday, May 4 from 10 a.m. to 8:30 p.m. and Saturday, May 5 from 10 a.m. to 6:30 p.m. at the Salt Palace. You can print off free tickets ($10 value each) here.

Go to www.upliftutahfamilies.org for more information.

PEOPLE magazine released its annual “Most Beautiful” issue this week with Beyonce Knowles named “World’s Most Beautiful Woman” this year.

Zac Efron’s all grown up.

I usually don’t watch TV during the day, but yesterday morning while I was in the laundry room  talking to a good friend of mine, the TV happened to be on. I caught an interview with Zac Efron and Taylor Schilling on Good Things Utah talking about their new movie out this Friday, “The Lucky One” based on the novel by Nicholas Sparks.

I admit, I am sort of addicted to Sparks. I have read almost every single one of his books, and have seen the screen versions of “Walk to Remember”, “The Notebook” (minus a scene or two, my favorite movie), and “Dear John”. I was excited to see this one as well since, of course, I read the book.

While the gals from Good Things were giggling about Efron and pummeling him with questions such as, “What’s it like to have girls gushing all over you?” (them and me included), they were showing scenes from the upcoming movie in the background.

And those scenes were a little-or a lot-bit racy. And…steamy. And maybe push the very limits of PG-13. In fact, at that moment as my friend and I sat in awkward silence and watched, she quietly said, “Um…I wouldn’t take a 13 year old to see that. Would you?”

Heavens no! Which got me thinking…then why is it so ok for me to go see?

Sure, I’m an adult. And I’ve seen and read Nicholas Sparks, so I know what he’s about and what he likes to play up, which is the romance.

And somehow, I’ve done a really good job justifying that because of those two facts, I am ok to see things I would probably be uncomfortable taking my 13 year old nieces to-espcially those who remember Efron as prepubescent basketball playing cutie in the High School Musicals.

So I want to know your thoughts: what do you think about Sparks and the movies based on his books? Are you going to see the film? Do you get uncomfortable during the “adult” scenes, or see them from a more “artistic” and story-telling point of view?

Tonight Sherri Shepherd was eliminated from “Dancing With The Stars” a “shocker” according to the judges.

Credit: beta.abc.go.com

Although overcome with emotion, Shepherd said something that really made me think:

“The thing that scares you the most, the thing that makes you think ‘I don’t know if I can do that’-run towards it because it’s truly amazing on the other side.”

I started to think about what scares me. What am I holding back on because I’m afraid of failure? How much more amazing could my life be if I let go of all my inhibitions?

I recently did a play with a young boy named Sammy. When asked why he tried out, he said, “My dad always tells us to do something we think is really hard every day. That day it was auditioning for this play.”

And he got the role. I was amazed at his courage. And I love the advice his father gave him. It made me want to do the same.

There’s a quote in this years’ Mary Englebreit calendar for the month of July by Jamie Lee Curtis that I love: “Everything you want in the world is just right outside your comfort zone-EVERY SINGLE THING YOU COULD POSSIBLY WANT!”

Have you ever done something you thought you couldn’t or put you outside your comfort zone? How did it pay off in the end?

Have you seen the video of mom and actress Alicia Silverstone feeding her son Bear?

Sorry. I meant to say, Have you seen the video of mom and actress Alicia Silverstone feeding her son bear MOUTH TO MOUTH?!

Silverstone posted a video on her website thekindlife.com of her taking a bite of their “delicious breakfast of miso soup, collards and radish steamed and drizzled with flax oil, cast iron mochi with nori wrapped outside, and some grated daikon. “Yum!”

Translation: “Hello. I am what some would call extreme.”

But wait-it’s not the bizarre breakfast food that is making headlines. It’s the way she’s feeding her son by taking a bite herself, chewing it for awhile, and then spitting it into her child’s mouth, birdy style.

Says Silverstone:

“I fed Bear the mochi and a tiny bit of veggies from the soup…from my mouth to his. It’s his favorite…and mine. He literally crawls across the room to attack my mouth if I’m eating.”

I have to wonder why she would think this is the best way to feed her child. Maybe…she believes the enzymes in her saliva will break down the food and be better for her son second-hand? Or she’s worried he’ll choke if he tries to swallow large pieces of nori or mochi or radish? (I don’t even know if there ARE large pieces of nori or mochi because I have no idea what either one is.) Perhaps she doesn’t want to dirty a spoon? My mind is reeling!

I am all for natural, organic, and healthy food. I am even all for “natural” feeding, aka breastfeeding. And I admit there’s been a time or ten when I’ve bit an apple chunk, piece of cheese or grape in two and handed my little one the other half, which was, I guess, partially in my mouth.

But imagining him actually getting his entire meal from in there makes me uncomfortable. My children don’t weird me out or make me feel icky in any way-after growing them inside me, birthing them, breastfeeding, changing diapers, wiping boogers, cleaning up barf, bathing them, and basically not being surprised or grossed out by any part of them or their bodily functions, I STILL don’t think I would want to feed them mouth to mouth.

But I want to know what YOU think. Sound off, peeps.

Because of our crazy schedules the last…er, few months my husband and I have had to get creative on our Friday night date nights.

Creative as in, bring our two boys along.

This has worked out fine in the past, but it seems that within the last few weeks our boys have upped the energy a few notches at dinner.

At Iggy’s two weeks ago my sons were literally using the boothe as a gym mat and were running, bouncing, wrestling, and rolling around the length of it all night. My husband and I sat at either end of the semi-circle and acted as crash pads.

It was very romantic.

Because we’ve temporarily re-located to Salt Lake while our home is being built in Lehi, we don’t have the luxury of nieces, sisters, aunts, and friends who were willing to watch our boys for an evening. My husband and I both have family who live up here, but we feel guilty constantly taking turns between my parents and his (who are just a little busy.)

So we’ve started to cart our kids along. And despite having most our meal end up on the floor (sorry, Z-tejas-the four bites I had were de-lish!) we feel that family date night is better than no date night-and our kids love the change of atmosphere and special attention from mom and dad.

I recently read a post from the Chiquita Moms blog about Family Night date nights, and she had some great ideas for including kids in your night out. Check it out at chiquitamoms.com.

Do you still do date night as a couple, or do you bring kids along? What ideas do you have that are fun for family nights out on the town?